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Destinul femeii - de Prism la: 19/04/2005 02:34:14
(la: FEMEIA intre cariera si cratita; BARBATUL...unde mai are loc...)
"De ce oare femeile moderne trebie sa fie altceva decit au fost programate genetic ? mame, sotii... Nu asta le este destinul ? De ce marea parte a femeilor crescute sub umbrela emanciparii feministe din anii 70-90, alt cataclism social care a lasat in urma si inca lasa, milioane de familii destramate si copii rmasi pe drumuri, incearca sa isi asume roluri de mame si tati in acelasi timp doar din dorinta de fi independente, doar sa constate ca nici independente nu le este bine, indiferent de cit ridicat nivelul lor intelectual sau de cultura. Adevarul este simplu - caracter, bun simt si o intoarcere la valorile familiei traditionale pot face un camin fericit si o familie realizata chiar si intre doi intelectuali care inteleg ca din momentul in care si-au proclamat iubirea in altar, au creat un nucleu pentru care ORICE altceva (familie, interese meschine, dorinte de extravagante sexuale, bani etc) nu sint decit amentintari la pacea familiei. Stimate doamne, de-a lungul ultimilor citeva mii de ani, barbatii au fost cei care au ghidat familia, cei care si-au asuma responsabilitatea mentinerii ei intregi si in pace, si indiferent cit de mare ar fi doarinta dumneavoastra de emancipare nu veti putea intoarce la 180 de grade in 20 de ani o ordine milenara inradacinata adinc in cultura si mesajul genetic al ambelor sexe.Cutia Pandorei nu face decit sa lase la iveala caracterul meschin, incapacitatea de a urmari si mentine binele cuplului si egoismul femeii care printr-un mod sau altul a obtinut cit de cit ceva drepturi si puterea de a distruge.

Sa nu va imaginati ca daca bunicele dumneavoastra nu vorbeau 3 limbi si nu se imbracau la Chanel erau mai inapoiate intelectual sau social ca dumneavoastra. Au fost inzestrate si crescute cu acel bun simt care le-a permis sa-si creasca copii si nepoti frumosi si sanataosi, sa aiba grija de barbatii lor si sa mentina camine fericite si sanatoase, chestii pe care nu multe femei le mai pot face in ziua de azi, indiferent cite PhD-uri au sau cite limbi vorbesc. Au fost crescute de mame care au stiut ce trebiua sa le invete ca sa-si indeplinesca menirea lor de sotii si femei. Because, myladies, at the end of the day, doing a good job and doing it right is the most important thing both women and men can do. We could philosofy as much as you'd like about gender equality, social fulfillment, intellectual challenges and fulfillment but you and I both know that this is b.s. Look around you and see how many neurotic single men and women are roaming around pretending to "date", to be in "search of their soulmate" when nobody knows what that means exactly. Shrinks are just as many as lawyers or plastic surgeons and are making just as much $$$$. This must say something about the state of sanity of the so called intellectualism and intellectuals in the 21 century.... Please don't get me wrong, all I tried to pinpoint here is the use and need of traditional man-woman gender relations in a healthy society. Nothing more, nothing less."
#44241 (raspuns la: #44005) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
banc de pe e-mail - de Belle la: 20/04/2005 20:57:40
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "2")
Wine

For all of us who are married, were married, wish you were married, or wish you weren't married, this is something to smile about the next time you open a bottle of wine.

Mike was driving home from one of his business trips in Northern Arizona when he saw an elderly Navajo man walking on the side of the road. As the trip was a long and quiet one, he stopped the car and asked the Navajo man if he would like a ride.

With a silent nod of thanks, the old man got into the car.

Resuming the journey, Mike tried in vain to make a bit of small talk with the Navajo man. The old man just sat silently, looking intently at everything he saw, studying every little detail, until he noticed a brown bag on the seat next to Mike.

"What's in the bag?", asked the old man.

Mike looked down at the brown bag and said, "It's a bottle of wine. I got it for my Wife."

The Navajo man was silent for another moment or two. Then, speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, he said, "Good trade."
#44625 (raspuns la: #44618) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
Cum e cu fotografiatul prin alte parti; la noi e jale. - de Dinu Lazar la: 28/04/2005 07:02:03
(la: O conversatie cu DINU LAZAR, fotograf)
If you are photographing on federal lands, you will want to be familiar with the laws relating to your rights and restrictions. A typical nature photographer does not need a permit to photograph on federal lands. Specifically, a permit is required only for any filming or photography that:

involves the use of a model, set, or prop; or
requires entry into a closed area; or
requires access to the park before or after normal working hours.

A permit is not required for:

A visitor using a camera and/or a recording device for his/her own personal use and within normal visitation areas and hours; or
A commercial photographer not using a prop, model, or set, and staying within normal visitation areas and hours; or
Press coverage of breaking news. This never requires a permit, but is subject to the imposition of restrictions and conditions necessary to protect park resources and public health and safety, and to prevent impairment or derogation of park resources or values.

The full text is available at http://www.blm.gov/nhp/what/commercial/filming/permit.html and at http://www.nps.gov/policy/DOrders/DOrder53.html.

Fees will not be required for still photography as long as the photography takes place where members of the public are generally allowed or where additional administrative costs are not likely. 16 U.S.C. § 4601-6d(b).
#46060 (raspuns la: #45968) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
No Spika da Ingles - de Belle la: 06/05/2005 19:41:40
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "2")
A bus stops and two Italian men get on.

They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting
next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when
she hears one of them say the following:

"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come
once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I Come again and
pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."

"You foul-mouthed sex obsessed swine," retorted the lady
indignantly. "In this country.......we don't speak aloud in public places
about our sex lives........"

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin'About a sex?I'm A
justa tellin' my frienda how to spell 'Mississippi'."

I BET YOU GONNA READ THIS AGAIN!!!!!
#47334 (raspuns la: #47333) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
45 de posturi, 490 de vizitari... - de Georges Valch la: 15/05/2005 06:24:21
(la: Sandra Mae iubeste! Si tace...)
Comentariu de Georges Valch
... 5 zile, nu-i un bilantz rau deloc. Sunt sigur ca s-a perindat si iubitul tau pe aici. Desi, cred ca te gandesti serios daca sa-l mai consideri astfel. Stiu ca iti apar mesajele cu acelasi delay cu care imi apar mie. Noi suntem noi si trebuie sa fim verificati. Ceea ce nu-i chiar un lucru rau: asa cel putin suntem asigurati ca cineva ne citeste. :) Te felicit pentru ceea ce reusesti sa faci aici si daca asta de la care ai pornit aceasta conferinta este dorinta ta cea mai mare, iti doresc din tot sufletul, sa nu se implineasca. Altminteri poate vei fi nevasta unui nesimtit si totul va gravita in jurul unei cratitzi. Look around Sandra. Not everything is flying it's good to eat, but you can catch something better here if you're carefull! Nu trebuie sa cumperi toata vaca ca sa mananci o friptura buna. Think at that! Succes. Treci pe la mine sa bem un ceai. Adica ce am. Ciao.
banc - de Horia D la: 24/05/2005 21:44:13
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "3")
She was wearing a loose-fitting, pink dress - sleeveless with straps.

He was wearing his usual jeans and T-shirt. As they walked through the
ape exhibit, they passed in front of a large, silverback gorilla.

Noticing the wife, the gorilla went crazy. he jumped on the bars, and
holding on with one hand (and 2 feet), he grunted and pounded his chest with his free hand.

He was obviously excited at the pretty lady in the pink dress.

The husband, noticing the excitement, thought this was funny. He
suggested that his wife tease the poor fellow some more by puckering her lips and wiggling her bottom.

She played along and the gorilla got even more excited making noises
that would wake the dead. Then the husband suggested that she let one of her straps fall to show a little more skin. She did, and the gorilla
was about to tear the bars down.

"Now show your thighs and sort of fan your dress at him", he said.

This drove the gorilla absolutely crazy, and he started doing flips.

Then the husband grabbed his wife, ripped open the door to the cage,
flung her in with the gorilla and slammed the cage door shut.

"Now, tell him you have a headache."
abuz sexual, homosexualitate, boala - de Cassandra la: 25/05/2005 14:54:31
(la: Oamenii devin homosexuali/lesbiene, sau se nasc asa ?)
Este homosexualitatea o boala si ca atare trebuie aplicate tratamente pentru "vindecarea" ei?

Revista Americana de Psihiatrie a publicat in 1999 un articol: “Position statement on psychiatric treatment and sexual orientation. Am J Psychiatry 1999; 156:1131” , (articol aprobat de Board of Trustees of the American Psychiatric Association ) in care atrage atentia profesionalilor din sectorul sanatatii mintale asupra faptului ca nu exista evidenta stiintifica care sa sprijine eficienta tratamentelor pentru schimbarea orientarii sexuale. Articolul se adreseaza temei homosexualitatii si adopta o pozitie clara “impotriva discriminarii, prejudecatilor, si tratamentelor ne etice” (p. 1131)

In ceea ce priveste abuzul sexual la minori (baieti), este o tema extrem de complexa. Abuzul poate fi exercitat nu numai de barbati dar si de femei (de multe ori de propria mama) si ceea ce lasa in urma este in primul rind o trauma psihica pentru cel abuzat, care il va urmari toata viata. Homosexualitatea nu este principala preocupare la aceste persoane ci faptul ca sufera de confuzie in privinta propriei identitati sexuale. Eu cred ca in primul rind trebuie ajutati sa-si depaseasca aceasta confuzie si sa-si cunoasca si accepte identitatea sexuala oricare ar fi ea. Un fapt este cert – nu toti abuzatii sexual devin homosexuali. Iar daca terapistii s-ar incapatina doar sa-i vindece de homosexualitate cind de fapt atentia lor ar trebui indreptata spre multe alte aspecte cum sint increderea de sine, increderea in ceilalti, eliminarea sentimentului de vinovatie, agresivitatii etc, ce solutie ar mai avea aceste victime?
Male survivor este o organizatie pentru baietii si barbatii abuzati sexual. http://www.malesurvivor.org/index.htm Din aceasta pagina citez:

Ten Facts about Sexual Abuse of Boys and its Aftermath

6. Common symptoms for sexually abused men include: guilt, anxiety, depression, interpersonal isolation, shame, low self-esteem, self-destructive behavior, post-traumatic stress reactions, poor body imagery, sleep disturbance, nightmares, anorexia or bulimia, relational and/or sexual dysfunction, and compulsive behavior like alcoholism, drug addiction, gambling, overeating, overspending, and sexual obsession or compulsion.

8. There is no compelling evidence that sexual abuse fundamentally changes a boy's sexual orientation, but it may lead to confusion about sexual identity and is likely to affect how he relates in intimate situations

Si mai citez din aceeasi pagina, sint cuvintele unui membru al organizatiei, victima abuzului sexual:

“SA does not create gay people - if that were true then the majority of SA boys or girls would grow up gay.
I think what is more important to focus on is what we intend to do with whatever our orientation is. The important thing is to accept ourselves just as we are and learn to love the person that is deep inside of us. And, if we are lucky at sometime in life, we will find someone else who loves us unconditionally - be that male, female, gay, straight, etc.
There are no simple answers in life and, as I said in my previous post, life is FULL of shades of grey.”


Si iata ce raspund participantii (toti sint victime ale abuzului sexual) forumului din pagina respectiva cind li s-a cerut sa scrie o lista de minciuni in legatura cu conditia lor:

Minciuni:
“I must be gay because I liked it & went back.

I must be gay because I looked for gay sex on my own afterward.

Don't even think of having a girlfriend, girls wont like you. They will smell your shame like dog sh*t.
Uncle F loved me.
I don't belong here. (everywhere, anywhere: I feel this at home, at friend's houses, in school, at work, while travelling of living abroad.)
I have to become a CONTROL freak to keep from being vulnerable.

I held onto these lies until three four years ago (age 31 then). My wife came up with the name "the wall" for the prison I kept my heart in. It blew my mind away how
much the abuse & the lies shaped my life. It tainted every decision I made in my life, it probably still does to a degree.

~George~”



“THIS IS A LIE:
I am dumb.
I am stupid.
I am an idiot.
I have shit for brains.
I am booksmart but not smart.
I have no common sense.
I can't think.

THIS IS A LIE:
Mothers don't sexually abuse.

THIS IS A LIE:
My body responded, I must have enjoyed it.

THIS IS A LIE:
I must be a sissy, because this only happens to sissies and girls.

This is a lie:
I am gay

This is a lie:
I should cease to exist

This is a lie:
I cannot face this.

This is a lie:
Therapy will kill me.

This is a lie:
I cannot trust

This is a lie:
I am inconsequential

This is a lie:
I am alone in this, no one could possibly understand what I've been through.

This is a lie:
I am an embarrassment to the family

This is a lie:
Death is better than life”


Ce remarc este ca aceste persoane se infrunta mai degraba cu o serie de minciuni induse de societate si de fapt asta este "boala" de care sufera si de care au nevoie sa se vindece. Iar cine insista pe tema homosexualitatii ca boala, perversiune, tara sociala etc. nu face decit sa contribuie la trauma acestor persoane.
oki don - de Belle la: 01/06/2005 15:42:43
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "3")
ia notite (nu-ti traduc ca stiu ca n-ai probleme cu engleza)

Chewy Flour Tortillas

These tortillas have real body and taste; they are perfect for gorditas, fajitas and eating out of hand.

2 C All-purpose flour
1-½ t Baking powder
1 t Salt
2 t Vegetable oil
¾ C Lukewarm milk (2% is fine)
Stir together the flour and baking powder in a large mixing bowl. Add the salt and vegetable oil to the lukewarm milk and whisk briefly to incorporate. Gradually add the milk to the flour, and work the mixture into a dough. It will be sticky.

Turn the dough out onto a surface dusted with flour and knead vigorously for about 2 minutes (fold and press, fold and press). The kneading will take care of the stickiness. Return the dough to the bowl, cover it with a damp cloth, and let it rest for 15 minutes. (This dough will not rise, but it needs a rest.)

Divide your dough into 8 balls of equal size, cover them, and let them rest again for about 20 minutes. Avoid letting them touch, if you don't want them to stick together.
Dust your work surface with flour. Working one at a time, remove each piece of dough and pat it into a 5-inch circle. With a rolling pin, roll out the tortilla, working from the center out, until you have a 7- or 8-inch tortilla a little less than ¼-inch thick. Transfer the tortilla to a hot, dry skillet or griddle. It will begin to blister. Let it cook for 30 seconds, turn it, and let the other side cook for 30 seconds. Remove the tortilla, place it in a napkin-lined basket and cover with aluminum foil. Repeat for the remaining tortillas.

Although flour tortillas, like corn tortillas, are best if eaten right after they are made, these tortillas will freeze well. Wrap them tightly in plastic, and they will keep, frozen, for several weeks. To serve tortillas that have been frozen, let them thaw and come to room temperature, then wrap them in aluminum foil and heat them in a warm oven. Microwaving tends to toughen them.

Here are some tips as to technique:

Do not use bread flour. You want flour with a low gluten content.
You don't want to over-flour your work surface, but you don't want your rolled-out tortilla sticking to it either. I found that the dough adhered less to an unvarnished wood surface (like an old cutting board) than any other surface I tried.
A flat dough scraper, known in baking parlance as a "bench knife", is very efficient in removing the rolled-out tortilla from the work surface.
When rolling out tortillas, dust your rolling pin with flour, and don't be afraid to apply pressure. Flour tortilla dough is pretty sturdy; but not to the point of rerolling. You don't want tough tortillas.
Once you get a rhythm going, you can roll out a tortilla, put it on to cook and, while it cooks, roll out your next tortilla. Seems like an arduous process but, with this method, I could produce 8 tortillas in about 10 action-packed minutes. Be sure to rewrap your fresh tortillas each time you add another to the stack.

If you like, you can substitute one cup of whole wheat flour for one cup of the all-purpose flour.

My personal preference is for plain tortillas but, if desired, you can spice up this recipe by adding

A tablespoon of chopped fresh herbs (like oregano or rosemary)
A teaspoon or so of dried herbs
Freshly ground black pepper
A tablespoon of minced jalapeños
A little garlic powder (or substitute garlic salt for the salt)
If you choose to experiment with seasonings, mix dry spices with the flour mixture and fresh or "wet" seasonings with the milk.


mai multe detalii poti gasi aici
http://www.texascooking.com/features/sept98flourtortillas.htm

uite inca o reteta
http://www.dianaskitchen.com/page/bread/tortilla.htm

#52639 (raspuns la: #52638) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
fara traducere - de Pasagerul la: 16/06/2005 21:32:19
(la: Un nou forum: "Bancuri, glume, poante...")
Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day, and they both go before the angel to find out if they'll be admitted to heaven.
Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the angel must decide which of them gets in.
The angel asks Dolly if there's a particular reason why she should go to heaven, whereupon she takes off her top and says,
"Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever
created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them
every day, for eternity."
The angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question.
The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse, shakes it up, and gargles. Then, she spits into the toilet, and pulls the lever.
The angel says, "OK, your Majesty, you may go in."
Dolly is outraged and asks, "What was that all about? I show you two of Gods own perfect creations, and you turn me down.
She simply gargles and she gets in. Would you explain that
to me?"
"Sorry, Dolly," says the angel, "but even in heaven, a royal flush beats a pair, no matter how big they are."


Have a wonderful day

--------------------------------------------------
If you always do what you've always done
you'll always get what you always got.
am venit si eu - de Horia D la: 11/07/2005 17:10:57
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "4")
cine face un rezumat? si ca sa incepeti saptamana pe un ton bun, uite si un banc primit de la un prieten...enjoy.

Two Nuns
There were two nuns...

One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM),

and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).

It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.

SM:Have you noticed that a man has been following us for
the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.
SL:It's logical. He wants to rape us.
SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes
at the most! What can we do?
SL:The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.
SM:It's not working.
SL:Of course it's not working. The man did the only
logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.
SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.
SL:The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and
I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both.
So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.

Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is
worried about what has happened to Sister Logical.

Then Sister Logical arrives.

SM:Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell me what happened!
SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn't follow us both,so he followed me
SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?
SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run
as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.
SM: And?
SL: The only logical thing happened. He reached me.
SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?
SL: The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.
SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?
SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.

SM:Oh, no! What happened then?
SL: Isn't it logical, Sister?
A nun with her dress up can run faster than man with his pants down.

And for those of you who thought it would be dirty,
say two Hail Marys
oasis, to start... - de andleia la: 14/07/2005 20:46:38
(la: Versuri din melodiile voastre preferate...)
Don't Look Back In Anger

Slip inside the eye of your mind
Don't you know you might find
A better place to play
You said that you'd once never been
All the things that you've seen
Will slowly fade away

So I'll start the revolution from my bed
Cos you said the brains I had went to my head
Step outside the summertime's in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out

So Sally can wait, she knows its too late as we're walking on by
Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger I hear you say

Take me to the place where you go
Where nobody knows if it's night or day
Please don't put your life in the hands
Of a Rock n Roll band
Who'll throw it all away

So I'll start the revolution from my bed
Cos you said the brains I had went to my head
Step outside the summertime's in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out

So Sally can wait, she knows its too late as we're walking on by
Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger I hear you say

Don't look back in anger
Don't look back in anger
Don't look back in anger
At least not today


si evident, Wonderwall...

Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now

Backbeat the word was on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk along are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
I don't know how

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day
But they'll never throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About you now

And all the roads that lead to you were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
I don't know how

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after an
You're my wonderwall

Said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me


banc - de Horia D la: 18/07/2005 22:19:06
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "4")
A married man left work early one Friday afternoon. Instead of going home, however, he spent the weekend partying with the boys.
When he finally returned home on Sunday night, his wife really got on his
case and stayed on it.

After a couple of hours of swearing and screaming, his wife paused and
pointed at him and made him an offer. "How would you like it if you
didn't see me for a couple of days??!?".....

The husband couldn't believe his luck, so he looked up, smiled and said,
"That would suit me just fine!!"

Monday went by, and the man didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday went by and he still didn't see her.

Come Thursday, the swelling went down a bit and he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
#60215 (raspuns la: #60213) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
kate bush - organic acid - de zaraza la: 19/07/2005 23:37:13
(la: Versuri din melodiile voastre preferate...)
ma fascineaza in ultima vreme.

ptr cine e interesat de un download:

http://www.norbry.net/kate-bush/mp3/

He got her drunk very quickly
Holding hands, they found the broom-cupboard
Where he had control as far as the fall
When his hand covered wet hair
She took over among furniture wax
Dust, and the cloying yellow of polishing-cloth
When he was sick, she comforted him


Oh hush, my friend, and sleep
And cuddle to the wind
Sleep on through the waves
That may wet your lover's dream

We have been far through this night long hours
We will go far, tomorrow, out of sight, ooh...


He couldn't do it properly
The disco, the office, the pub,
Had left out those details of delight.
Satisfied, he would collapse out,
Puzzled at why she still squirmed,
Held onto him, tears curling into her mouth
This was something their stories always omitted
That her joy would seem like pain
When he focused after his release.


Do sand and shells and stones
Peep in through your night?
But you should not be hurt
For all will pass with time.

We have been far through this night long hours
We will go far, tomorrow, out of sight, ooh...


In the third week of the relationship
She was tripping on organic acid
Would stop to pick up a rained-out leaf
Would give it tenderly into his hand
Full of dead things before they reached the car

When they drove she sat with mouth open
As though photographed on the impact of a stomach punch
Her right fist gripping the skin of his left leg

Hooking the steering-wheel closer to his heart
He feared her, and slapped out sideways into her face
She entered the cut with her tongue
Gurgling gratitude for the strange taste


Do you fear the dark?
Then hush, and realise
That though the angels never come
Prayers can soothe your mind

We have been far through this night long hour
We will go far, tomorrow, out of sight, ooh...


There was no premonition of the wet Hog's Back
The sportscar slumped, snout into a beech
Their corpses giving the vehicle arms
Petrol and blood at last dripping together
But quick flashes of a planned lunch
Cold red beef, white cloth by a cherrywood fire
Game pie, and for him two pints of colder beer
The winter air tucking under their eyelids
As they spun on the gravel at Clandon
Their hands steaming from quick moisture
The aromatic finger drawn up to his nostril
Dazed after mutual masturbation
They zigzagged into a conservative end


Oh hush, my friend, asleep.
This is a great example of "Did I say that out loud?" - de Horia D la: 04/08/2005 16:47:21
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "4")
Proaspat primita de la un prieten

This actually happened at Harvard University in October last year.
In a biology class, The professor was discussing the high glucose
levels found in semen which gives the sperm all the energy for their
journey.

A female freshman raised her hand and asked, "If I understand,
you're saying there Is a lot of glucose, as in sugar, in semen?"

"That's correct," responded the professor, going on to add statistical
info.

Raising her hand again, she asked, Then why doesn't it taste
sweet?"

After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing.

The poor girl's face turned bright red, and as she realized exactly
what she had inadvertently said (or rather implied), she picked up her
books without a word and walked out of class.

However, as she was going out the door, the professor's reply was classic.

Totally straight-faced, he answered her question, It doesn't taste sweet
because the taste buds for sweetness are on the tip of your tongue and
not the back of your throat. Have a good day."
#63247 (raspuns la: #63244) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
You know you're a "redneck" if..... - de Horia D la: 09/08/2005 16:56:12
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "4")
Your standard of living improves when you go camping.
Your prenuptial agreement mentions chickens.
You have jacked up your home to look for a dog.
You have a relative living in your garage.
Your neighbor has ever asked to borrow a quart of beer.
There is a belch on your answering machine greeting.
You have rebuilt a carburetor while sitting on the commode.
None of the tires on your van are the same size.
Your town put the new garbage truck in the Christmas parade.
Your local beauty salon also fixes cars.
Your doghouse and your living room have the same shag carpet.
You've ever slow danced in the Waffle House.
Starting your car involves popping the hood.
Your garbage man is confused about what goes and what stays.
You whistle at women in church.
You've been in a fistfight at a yard sale.
You carry a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach the kids in the backseat.
If you've ever fixed a broken coil primary wire on a car with a safety pin off your date's bra strap, and didn't think the date was unusual.
If you've got a matching set of salad bowls that all say "cool whip" on them.
If you take the Christmas lights on the front porch down in November, and only long enough to get them working again.
You've ever used duct tape to repair dental work.
You've unstopped a sink with a shotgun.
Your will states your wife can't touch your money 'til she's fourteen.
You have to pass through a metal detector to get into a family reunion.
Your coffee table is also a cooler!
Your mailing address includes the word "holler".
The first time you ever saw your wife in lingerie, you had to pay a cover charge.
You've sold a car to settle a bar tab.
The best sofa you ever had came out of a Chevrolet.
You've ever used your bathtub as a punch bowl.
If you have ever been accused of lying through your tooth.
If you have ever used a barstool as a walker.
You hold the hood of your car with your head while you work on it.
#64338 (raspuns la: #64333) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
La ceai cu Sandra Mae - de cico la: 11/08/2005 02:16:12
(la: "Academia Cafeavencu")
Un schimb admirativ de mesaje intre Georges Valch si Sandra Mae. Toate bune si frumoase, de n-ar fi fost acelasi individ ce se batea singur pe burtica :)

................................
invitatia : http://www.cafeneaua.com/node/view/4596/49016#49016
45 de posturi, 490 de vizitari...
#49016, de Georges Valch la Sun, 15/05/2005 - 06:24

Comentariu de Georges Valch
... 5 zile, nu-i un bilantz rau deloc. Sunt sigur ca s-a perindat si iubitul tau pe aici. Desi, cred ca te gandesti serios daca sa-l mai consideri astfel. Stiu ca iti apar mesajele cu acelasi delay cu care imi apar mie. Noi suntem noi si trebuie sa fim verificati. Ceea ce nu-i chiar un lucru rau: asa cel putin suntem asigurati ca cineva ne citeste. :) Te felicit pentru ceea ce reusesti sa faci aici si daca asta de la care ai pornit aceasta conferinta este dorinta ta cea mai mare, iti doresc din tot sufletul, sa nu se implineasca. Altminteri poate vei fi nevasta unui nesimtit si totul va gravita in jurul unei cratitzi. Look around Sandra. Not everything is flying it's good to eat, but you can catch something better here if you're carefull! Nu trebuie sa cumperi toata vaca ca sa mananci o friptura buna. Think at that! Succes. Treci pe la mine sa bem un ceai. Adica ce am. Ciao.

.....................................
raspunsul : http://www.cafeneaua.com/node/view/4599/49190#49190
Hello Valch!
#49190, de Sandra Mae la Sun, 15/05/2005 - 21:24

Pune te rog ceaiul ala la incalzit, sa-l bem iute si sa plec dracului de aici!
Iti multumesc de vizita. Si de sfaturi. Cand vad cat de fair ai fost cu mine mi-e ciuda ca a trebuit sa va mint pe toti. Dar plansul fara ceapa, e cel mai nesanatos dintre toate. Okay. Hai ca tre' sa plec, vorba ta. Bun ce ai daca asta ai! ;) La multzi fani!

Posted by Sandra Mae

-----------------
In amintire ;), o mica idee despre modul in care a fost nevoit sa ne paraseasca dl Valch\Mae :

georges-proxenet, ce cauti pe aici???

te-ai inselat nenicule de adresa,
ia-ti curvele, lorelie, sandra si cum s-ar mai chema
si carate in viteza de aici,

ce cauti aici?
asta-i noua cale sa te prostituezi?
ca la "bucala".. cred ca numai la cafea nu te gandeai...

simteam eu ca pute...
phiii...
ar trebui sa dea "adminu" cu dezinfectantul
..............
aici e nevoie de f u m i g a t i o n !!!! :))
................
eu zic ca admin ar trebui sa scoata porcariile astea cu totul
................
PROXENETUL si CURVELE... hai fetele de aici..

AFFARAAAAAA cu macroul (sau pestele)!!!!!!

hai sa plecam de aici,ca numa ne compromitem...
hai in ograda noastra...
................
Avramescule, pacat de tine. Esti un prapadit de obsedat sexual. Esti bolnav de putzi pentru ca esti putred inauntru!
.................
inca un "case study" pentru exemplificarea trollismului...
cassandra - de om la: 11/08/2005 17:25:13
(la: Oamenii nu se trag din maimuta)
mersic de biblio...adevarat ca am citit cate ceva din fiecare cand eram mic, dar de asemenea, eram unpic razboinic si "vedeam" cam in genul "what I'd say to martians " by Jack Handey
WHAT I’D SAY TO THE MARTIANS
by Jack Handey
Issue of 2005-08-08 and 15
Posted 2005-08-01


People of Mars, you say we are brutes and savages. But let me tell you one thing: if I could get loose from this cage you have me in, I would tear you guys a new Martian asshole.You say we are violent and barbaric, but has any one of you come up to my cage and extended his hand? Because, if he did, I would jerk it off and eat it right in front of him. “Mmm, that’s good Martian,” I would say.

You say your civilization is more advanced than ours. But who is really the more “civilized” one? You, standing there watching this cage? Or me, with my pants down, trying to urinate on you? You criticize our Earth religions, saying they have no relevance to the way we actually live. But think about this: if I could get my hands on that god of yours, I would grab his skinny neck and choke him until his big green head exploded.

We are a warlike species, you claim, and you show me films of Earth battles to prove it. But I have seen all the films about twenty times. Get some new films, or, so help me, if I ever get out of here I will empty my laser pistol into everyone I see, even pets.

Speaking of films, I could show you some films, films that portray a different, gentler side of Earth. And while you’re watching the films I’d sort of slip away, because guess what: the projector is actually a thing that shoots out spinning blades! And you fell for it! Well, maybe not now you wouldn’t.

You point to your long tradition of living peacefully with Earth. But you know what I point to? Your stupid heads.

You say there is much your civilization could teach ours. But perhaps there is something that I could teach you—namely, how to scream like a parrot when I put your big Martian head in a vise.

You claim there are other intelligent beings in the galaxy besides earthlings and Martians. Good, then we can attack them together. And after we’re through attacking them we’ll attack you.

I came here in peace, seeking gold and slaves. But you have treated me like an intruder. Maybe it is not me who is the intruder but you.

No, not me. You, stupid.

You keep my body imprisoned in this cage. But I am able to transport my mind to a place far away, a happier place, where I use Martian heads for batting practice.

I admit that sometimes I think we are not so different after all. When you see one of your old ones trip and fall down, do you not point and laugh, just as we on Earth do? And I think we can agree that nothing is more admired by the people of Earth and Mars alike than a fine, high-quality cigarette. For fun, we humans like to ski down mountains covered with snow; you like to“milk” bacteria off of scum hills and pack them into your gill slits. Are we so different? Of course we are, and you will be even more different if I ever finish my homemade flamethrower.

You may kill me, either on purpose or by not making sure that all the surfaces in my cage are safe to lick. But you can’t kill an idea. And that idea is: me chasing you with a big wooden mallet.

You say you will release me only if I sign a statement saying that I will not attack you. And I have agreed, the only condition being that I can sign with a long sharp pen. And still you keep me locked up.

True, you have allowed me reading material—not the “human reproduction” magazines I requested but the works of your greatest philosopher, Zandor or Zanax or whatever his name is. I would like to discuss his ideas with him—just me, him, and one of his big, heavy books.

If you will not free me, at least deliver a message to Earth. Send my love to my wife, and also to my girlfriend. And to my children, if I have any anyplace. Ask my wife to please send me a bazooka, which is a flower we have on Earth. If my so-called friend Don asks you where the money I owe him is, please anally probe him. Do that anyway.

If you keep me imprisoned long enough, eventually I will die. Because one thing you Martians do not understand is that we humans cannot live without our freedom. So, if you see me lying lifeless in my cage, come on in, because I’m dead. Really.

Maybe one day we will not be the enemies you make us out to be. Perhaps one day a little Earth child will sit down to play with a little Martian child, or larva, or whatever they are. But, after a while, guess what happens: the little Martian tries to eat the Earth child. But guess what the Earth child has? A gun. You weren’t expecting that, were you? And now the Martian child is running away, as fast as he can. Run, little Martian baby, run!

I would like to thank everyone for coming to my cage tonight to hear my speech. Donations will be gratefully accepted. (No Mars money, please.)
#64837 (raspuns la: #64717) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
De invatat - de Dinu Lazar la: 14/08/2005 08:08:05
(la: O conversatie cu DINU LAZAR, fotograf)
Un link important pentru oricine are sau zice ca are sau chiar n-are legatura cu fotografia profesionala dar vrea sa stie cum merg lucrurile: http://www.danheller.com/biz-marketing
Si inca o chestie tare: http://www.danheller.com/truisms.html
Si bomboana pe coliva, citeva fraze care pun punctul pe i:
-------------
Once a year we rent out a large
meeting room at a downtown hotel, send out hundreds of invitations to
potential buyers of our services, and for $25 or so, we each get a table to
display our wares. We may use pretty much whatever methods we want to catch
the attention of attendees. The other event we sponsor is a portfolio
showcase, wherein we rent space at a local gallery once a year and put up
our photos, layouts, etc., on boards, on the walls and on easels. We invite
hundreds to this event as well. It is more of a passive interaction. All of
the creatives involved try to be in attendance, but that is not required. I
have found it helpful to be on site to answer any questions and to smooze.
On the other hand,the seminars I have attended have been informational, like
a Photoshop techniques or Epson or a Fuji. I can't say that attending
seminars would or would not be helpful for you or anyone else. For me, I
always pick up at least one useful bit of information. I think that everyone
has to come up with his/her own mix of promotion. For me, I seem to get more
work as I get out and about, interact, give out cards, get all the free
promo I can. My hard copy portfolio has gone out only once in the last three
years, to Parade Magazine. I was stunned to learn that they still want to
see trannys and/or tear sheets, not just the cyber equivalent.
Good luck with the web site, and with it's promotion. As far as people
stealing your work, I really believe there is no way to completely eliminate
that. I just keep stuff lo res, watermarked, etc. I have not designed a web
site, but a couple of photo friends have, and they say that Adobe GoLive is
just point and click. Takes about half a hour, so I hear. If this student
web designer daughter of a friend of mine does not come through with my
personal site very soon, I will try GoLive.
I hasten to add a disclaimer: If I had all the answers, or just a few of
them I would be clipping coupons in Bermuda just to keep busy, living off my
trust fund and sipping faux pina coladas (can't drink alcohol, but love the
beach). What sites are some of your photos on?
#65264 (raspuns la: #65257) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
A man goes in a pharmacy and - de Jimmy_Cecilia la: 17/08/2005 22:25:13
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "5")
A man goes in a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist:
-would you have Viagra, please?
-Of course Mister. Have you an ordinance?
- Not, but I have the photograph of my wife!

===

Germaine asks her neighbor:
-"Why the doctor did come at home yesterday, you were sick?
-I did ask to you whether the war were declared when
a soldier came at home last week?"

#66021 (raspuns la: #66011) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
gluma de dimineata - Italian Honeymoon - de Horia D la: 26/08/2005 15:50:14
(la: Trancaneala Aristocrata "5")
After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride
Virginia, Luigi stopped by his old barbershop in New York to say
hello to his friends. Giovanni said, "Hey Luigi, how wasa da treepa?"

Luigi said, "Everytinga wasa perfecto except for da traina ride
down."

"Whata you mean, Luigi?" Asked Giovanni.

"Well, we boarda da train at Grana Central Station. My beautiful
Virginia, she pack a biga basket a food. She broughta vino, some
nice cigars for me, and we were looking a forward to da trip.

Everytinga wasa Okey Dokey until we getta hungry and open upa da
luncha basket. The conductore come a by, waga hisa finger at us
and a say, 'No eat in disa car; musta use a dining car.'

"So, me and my beautiful Virginia, we go to dining car, eat a biga
luncha and start to open a bottle of nice a vino! Conductore walka
by again, waga hisa finger and say, 'No drinka in disa car; musta use
a club a car.' So, we go to club car.

While drinkina vino, I start to lighta my biga cigar. The
conductore, he waga his finger again and say, 'No smokina disa car;
musta go to smokina car.' We go to smokina car and I smoke a my biga
cigar.

Then my beautiful Virginia an me, we go to sleeper car anda go to
bed. We just about to go boomada boomada, and the conductore he walka
through da hall shouting at da top of hisa voice, 'Nofolka
Virginia! Nofolka Virginia!'

Next time, I'm a gonna take-a da bus."
#68157 (raspuns la: #68156) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului



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