bine spus, gigicule. dar ce este "educatia"? educatia este ceea ce ni se spune ca e corect si bine, ceea ce ni se spune ca trebuie sa facem si noi asta invatam. si bineinteles, puterea exemplului este fenomenala. la asa exemple ca in societatea romaneasca... cu asa educatie s-a ales romanul. romanul (barbat) a fost "educat"/ invatat ca el trebuie sa fie un mic pasha, iar femeia invatata ca nu-i bine sa cirteasca. in general.

FIINTA UMANA E RETICENTA LA SCHIMBARE. mai ales la schimbarile de mentalitate. si daca amaritele arabilor au fost educate de mici ca asa e bine sa poarte cirpe-n cap si ca asa e bine si frumos sa li se taie clitorisul, normal ca asta vor in continuare. la fel s-a intimplat si cu revolutia din china cind au interzis prin lege ca femeilor si fetelor sa li se mai lege picioarele. erau oloage saracele si tot zbierau ca nu vor sa-si dezlege picioarele si se ascundeau mai ceva ca de ciuma. mentalitatea unui grup social/ familial este setul de valori in limitele cariua indivizii respectivi se simt in siguranta si sunt capabili sa interactioneze. orice schimbare de mentalitate inseamna o iesire din acel "comfort zone", se vad dintr-odata pe teren necunoscut, resimt teama sau percep o amenintare subconstienta pt ca nu stiu daca vor fi capabili sa functioneze in acel nou mediu, asa incit reactioneaza. si cu cit teama este mai mare, cu atit este si reactia mai puternica.

in primul rind pt educarea celor din gasca de la bloc :))))
in al doilea rind, pt orice alte persoane civilizate si educate care doresc sa afle mai multe despre bullies si bullying ca fenomen. este un fenomen care apare de la cele mai fragede virste ale copilariei si se extinde in viata sociala si de familie pina la adinci batrineti daca bully -persoana - nu este corectata.

What is bullying?
Bullying is when someone keeps doing or saying things to have power over another person.
Some of the ways they bully other people are by: calling them names, saying or writing nasty things about them, leaving them out of activities, not talking to them, threatening them, making them feel uncomfortable or scared, taking or damaging their things, hitting or kicking them, or making them do things they don't want to do.
Have any of these things happened to you? Have you done any of these things to someone else? Really, bullying is wrong behaviour which makes the person being bullied feel afraid or uncomfortable.

Why do some people bully?
There are a lot of reasons why some people bully.
They may see it as a way of being popular, or making themselves look tough and in charge.
Some bullies do it to get attention or things, or to make other people afraid of them. Others might be jealous of the person they are bullying. They may be being bullied themselves.
Some bullies may not even understand how wrong their behaviour is and how it makes the person being bullied feel.

What is Workplace Bullying?
How do you know if you're being bullied? Bullying differs from harassment and assault in that the latter can result from a single incident or small number of incidents - which everybody recognises as harassment or assault - whereas bullying tends to be an accumulation of many small incidents over a long period of time. Each incident tends to be trivial, and on its own and out of context does not constitute an offence or grounds for disciplinary or grievance action. Workplace bullying includes:
· constant nit-picking, fault-finding and criticism of a trivial nature - the triviality, regularity and frequency betray bullying; often there is a grain of truth (but only a grain) in the criticism to fool you into believing the criticism has validity, which it does not; often, the criticism is based on distortion, misrepresentation or fabrication
· simultaneous with the criticism, a constant refusal to acknowledge you and your contributions and achievements or to recognise your existence and value
· constant attempts to undermine you and your position, status, worth, value and potential
· where you are in a group (eg at work), being singled out and treated differently; for instance, everyone else can get away with murder but the moment you put a foot wrong - however trivial - action is taken against you
· being isolated and separated from colleagues, excluded from what's going on, marginalised, overruled, ignored, sidelined, frozen out, sent to Coventry
· being belittled, demeaned and patronised, especially in front of others
· being humiliated, shouted at and threatened, often in front of others
· being overloaded with work, or having all your work taken away and replaced with either menial tasks (filing, photocopying, minute taking) or with no work at all
· finding that your work - and the credit for it - is stolen and plagiarised
· having your responsibility increased but your authority taken away
· having annual leave, sickness leave, and - especially - compassionate leave refused
· being denied training necessary for you to fulfil your duties
· having unrealistic goals set, which change as you approach them
· ditto deadlines which are changed at short notice - or no notice - and without you being informed until it's too late
· being subjected to disciplinary procedures with verbal or written warnings imposed for trivial or fabricated reasons and without proper investigation
· being coerced into leaving through no fault of your own, constructive dismissal, early or ill-health retirement, etc

"femeia nu e om, e... ceva acolo, ce creste pe langa casa omului..."

ai reusit sa rezumi intr-o singura fraza esenta problemei. intr-adevar, barbatul se considera mai cu motz, muncile casnice i se par "degradante", sub nivelul lui, si considera ca trebuie facute de femeie... caruia isi inchipuie ca ii este superior. ai dreptate, in mediile orasenesti se poate spune ca lucrurile au inceput sa se schimbe in ultimii ani - asta datorita faptului ca mult mai multe femei sunt scolite - fata de cele din mediul rural - au urmat o facultate si au invatat sa fie mai assertive, sa nu mai cedeze in fata argumentelor de genul "tu sa taci". si cum ai spus, exista in mediile orasenesti destui barbati care isi AJUTA sotia. dar vezi tu, a ajuta - implica a da o mina de ajutor sa termine mai repede muncile care considera ei ca ii revin femeii in mod natural. dac-ar fi dupa ei, n-ar face-o, insa n-au incotro (din motive economice, pragmatice, si pt ca... ulciorul nu merge de multe ori la apa: femeia a invatat sa nu mai cedeze atit de usor in fata unui "bully")

pt baietii din gashca de la bloc care nu stiu ce inseamna bullying, voi posta separat.

mai este inca mult de lucru la capitolul mentalitate. dovada sunt acele specimene care in viata reala "ajuta" la muncile casnice (din motivele pe care le-am spus mai inainte), dar pe net, la adapostul unui pseudonim, isi apara iluzia de superioritate masculina. de obicei, aceste specimene par sa nu vada dincolo de lungul nasului, insista ca problema nu exista... o neaga ca problema dar o apara ca beneficiu pt ego-ul lor. nevroza masculina tipica, exact asa cum e clasificata in manualele de specialitate.

n-am scris ca vad ceva rau in asta, am adus doar tema in discutie.

este a treia oara cind incerci sa te iei de mine personal, dar la tema pe care am pus-o in discutie tot n-ai reusit sa aduci argumente logice. atentie! am spus argumente LOGICE, nu argumente de genul "ma, tu sa taci!".

sper ca a fost suficient de scurt si de simplutz pt tine. promit sa nu mai dau raspunsuri atit de lungi, vad ca nu toti avem aceeasi brain horse-power ca sa facem fata unui text mai lung.