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Mamaliga "automata" la microwave
de MMM la: 24/10/2004 00:32:00
ma bazez pe o putere de microwave de 1000w. timpul se poate modifica ca sa acomodeze o putere mai mica sau mai mare./ retzeta este incredibil de simpla si practica cu rezultate garantate./ - luatzi un vas de yena sau orice vas care e bun de microwave./ - punetzi malaiul si apa (nu e nevoie sa amestecatzi !). o sa va ingrozitzi de aspectul apos al mestecului dar asa trebuie sa fie. nu mai adugatzi malai ! avetzi va rog incredere./ - punetzi pe 10 minute la puterea maxima vasul partzial acoperi  ...continuare .
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Eye Halve a Spelling Chequer - de MMM la: 23/11/2004 21:11:56
(la: Un nou forum: "Bancuri, glume, poante...")
Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rarely ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect in it's weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.

-- Sauce unknown

tot taxi - de MMM la: 23/11/2004 18:16:58
(la: Un nou forum: "Bancuri, glume, poante...")
Sare unul intr-un taxi: "La Otopeni va rog!"

O ia taxiul la goana si la prima intersectzie desi era pe rosu accelereaza si trece drept. Clientului i se face rau: " Domne' ai trecut pe rosu ! vrei sa faci un accident ?" Zice soferul:" Stai dom'le linistit, sint profesionist !".

La a doua intersectzie la fel accelereaza si trece drept pe rosu. Iarasi cleintul;' Domle esti nebun ? Ai sa ne omori!" . Soferul:" Stai linistit sint profesionist !".

E,i la a treia intersectize semaforul e pe verde; cind colo, soferul se opreste desi claxonau in spate tozti inebunitzi, si se uita bine in dreapta si pe urma bine in stinga si pe urma iar odata in dreapta si pe urma iar odata in stinga si in fine ii da drumul si traverseaza intersectzia.

Clientul a ramas paf: " Pai bine Dom'le cind era rosu ai trecut ca un bolid si la verde te-ai oprit ? De ce Dom'le ?" Soferul : "Pai sa m-asigur ca nu trece un alt profesionist !".

Va sa zica ne bilbiim ? - de MMM la: 17/11/2004 01:21:44
(la: Mamaliga "automata" la microwave)
La carare nu e atita chestie de lungime cit calitate care se masoara in fericire si eu pot sa zic ca totusi posed oleaca.

Si noroc ca-s strimb ca sa ma pot fofila in situatzii extreme.

Dar in schimb am ochi albastrii !

Si insist ca mamaliga iese buna !
#28967 (raspuns la: #28844) comenteaza . modifica . semnaleaza adminului
Instructions for a wife then and now - de MMM la: 16/11/2004 04:16:47
(la: Femeia)
The following is from a 1950's Home Economics textbook intended for
the High School girls, teaching how to prepare for married life.

1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a
delicious meal - on time. This is a way of letting him know that you
have been thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs. Most
men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal
are part of the warm welcome needed.

2. Prepare yourself: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed
when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and
be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. Be
a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a

3. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of
the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books,
toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables. Your husband
will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give
you a lift too.

4. Prepare the children: Take a few minutes to wash the children's
hands and faces if they are small, comb their hair, and if necessary,
change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to
see them playing the part.

5. Minimize the noise: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise
of washer, dryer, dishwasher, or vacuum. Try to encourage the children
to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and be
glad to see him.

6. Some DON'TS: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't
complain if he's late for dinner. Count this as minor compared with
what he might have gone through that day.

7. Make him comfortable: Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or
suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready
for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in
a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and

8. Listen to him: You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the
moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.

9. Make the evening his: Never complain if he does not take you out to
dinner or to other places of entertainment; instead try to understand
his world of strain and pressure and his need to be home and relax.

10. The Goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where
your husband can relax.

Now The updated version for the 2000s woman.

1. Have dinner ready: Make reservations ahead of time. If your day
becomes too hectic just leave him a voice mail message regarding where
you'd like to eat and at what time. This lets him know that your day
has been crappy and gives him an opportunity to change your mood.

2. Prepare yourself: A quick stop at the "LANCOME" counter on your way
home will do wonders for your outlook and will keep you from becoming
irritated every time he belches at the table. (Don't forget to use his
credit card!)

3. Clear away the clutter: Call the housekeeper and let her know
you'll need her for an extra day this week. Tell her that any
miscellaneous items left on the floor by the children can be placed in
the Goodwill box in the garage.

4. Prepare the children: Drop them off at grandma's!

5. Minimize the noise: When he arrives at home remind him that the
washer and garbage disposal are still not working properly and the
noise is driving you crazy (but do this in a nice way and greet him
with a warm smile...this way he might fix it faster).

6. Some DON'TS: Don't greet him with problems and complaints. Let him
speak first, and then your complaints will get more attention and
remain fresh in his mind throughout dinner. Don't complain if he's
late for dinner. Simply remind him that the last one home does the
cooking and the cleanup.

7. Make him comfortable: Remind him where he can find a warm fuzzy
blanket if he's cold. This will show you really care.

8. Listen to him: But don't ever let him get the last word.

9. Make the evening his: a chance to get the washer and garbage
disposal fixed.

10. The Goal: To try to keep things amicable without reminding him
that you make more money than he does.

Mica sugestie personala - de MMM la: 16/11/2004 04:04:23
(la: Fahrenheit 9/11)
Ca sa-l intzelegi complet (pe Moore) ar trebui sa incerci sa vezi inainte "Roger and Me" primul lui film. Asta va deslusi sub un altunghi fahrenheit 9/11. Moore este din Flynt,Michigan un oras care s-a inchis cind uzinele GM s-au inchis.


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